Last Week

Because I'm not going to write this in my journal because I'm lazy, I'll record it here.

Last week was a doozy!

Tuesday - Earthquake--epicenter about 20 miles from my parents in Virginia. We felt it up here in NJ.  Crazy!
Wednesday - explained "where babies come from" to Lucy.  She thought I was kidding. :)  So funny.
Thursday - worked at the new house for hours, pulled staples in the girls' new room for hours.  First I heard that Hurricane Irene was going to threaten our area.  Emergency Stake Welfare Meeting that night to discuss needs for member who would have to evacuate the coastal area.  Stressful!
Friday--Prep prep prep for the impending hurricane.  Stressful!
Saturday - more prep for the hurricane.  The rain started around 11am.  We were about as prepared as we could be.  Some holes in the preps but mostly it was pretty buttoned up.
Sunday - no church, hurricane moves up the coast and leaves us with a lot of wind but a beautiful sunny day.

No wonder I'm so tired.  Glad it's over.  Glad we all survived.  God is good.

Lessons I'm Pondering and Learning Part II

I wrote the first part of my "lessons" about a week ago and have just been kind of sitting on them and pondering.

I had a little smidge of a breakthrough in my quest to understand God's dealings with me/us.  

As I was praying/pondering last night, I was reminded of Jesus's words from the cross when he said, "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do." (Luke 23:34)

I think this is some sort of clue.  Jesus was specifically talking about the Roman soldiers that were performing the crucifixion.  They were not Jewish or Christian; they actually worshipped the Roman gods we learn about in school.

I think Jesus was actually speaking about us all.  I have a wonderful teenage daughter who is on the cusp of graduating high school.  She's been offered a couple of options for a job (she's chosen not to pursue a formal education) and is having difficulty deciding on what to do.  It's so interesting to be in my shoes and actually see clearly the path she should take that would be the easiest for her in the long term.  She's flirting with the easy road but will most likely choose the road that will ultimately be harder.  Alas, that is her choice and consequence, whether good or bad.

But, I'm brought back to Christ's plea to the father to forgive, because they don't know what they're doing.  It's the "they don't know what they're doing" part that is causing me to linger and ponder.  My daughter doesn't know what she's doing.  She's doing her best, seeking out counsel and trying to figure it out logically.  I have no doubt she'll work hard at whatever choice she makes.

I think the same goes for me.  I often disappoint or anger another.  MOST of the time I do it out of shear ignorance or with great intentions.  I do admit I sometimes do things on purpose.  :)  But, really, I'm often shocked to hear how a person perceived my actions or intentions.  I didn't know what I was doing. :)  I thought I was doing the best I could.  But, this causes disappointment and anger in others.  Some are quick to forgive, others-not so much.

I need to adjust my perceptions and remember the words of Jesus when someone offends me.  Regardless of their intentions.  MOST of the time they'll think they were doing the best they could.  Sometimes it'll be intentional.  Either way--"they know not what they do."

I could ramble a bit more, but I think I'll stop for a moment.  

Lessons I'm Pondering and Learning

I'm going through a growth spurt.  I've been learning all sorts of lessons about myself and how God interacts with me....us, really.

I don't know a lot yet.  I'm still in a pondering phase.  What have I been pondering?  Godly emotions.  Huh?

Recently I found myself VERY disappointed in a situation.  That sent me to ponder.  How does Heavenly Father deal with His disappointment in me (us)?  Then I thought, does God get disappointed in us?  Because that doesn't seem to be a very godly reaction.  Disappointment seems to be a selfish reaction.  As I wrote in my journal about my experience I realized that I was interjecting my "contribution" to the scenario, looking for appreciation and acknowledgement of a job well-done.  I got none of that.  But, I was never asking for it or outwardly looking for it.  But, I learned that deep inside my sweet little spirit was the selfish desire to see the good fruit of my works.  Yep.  We call that pride.

So, once I figured that out....I was ok with the "awakening" if you will.  I immediately set out to repent.  Not a bad thing.

The harder part was the acknowledgement to myself that I had wasted some time not taking better care of myself and accomplishing my own goals.  I'm NOT by any means saying that I regret a single minute of my efforts, I had just gotten side-tracked and lost myself.

I've never been one to take good care of myself.  That's too selfish.  That's the bad habit I'm trying to change.  I've been raising up a brand new baby for the last year so that definitely took up a lot of my time as well.  But, I find myself resorting to the same behaviors that kinda got me stuck in a rut.  ie....turning to the heavenly chocolate chip cookie vs. my Heavenly Father.

My pondering continues on how to react or not react to disappointment or anger like my Father in Heaven.  I'm sure that His all-encompassing love and omniscience helps a lot. A true understatement.

To be continued....

It's Official!

Liliana's been walking around the house for a while now, but mostly holding onto furniture with timid steps in between.

I'm going to declare Cinco De Mayo 2001 as Lili's official walking day.  That's about all she did all day.  Just walk around.

I can't believe my baby is a year old now.  Last year this time I had just gotten home from the hospital with this little sweetie pie.  I love her!  Couldn't imagine my life without the joy this child has brought into my life.  I'm sure glad God knows better than I do.  What a relief. :)

Leah and Bad Words

Just a quick note about little Leah.  She makes me laugh.  She's obviously becoming more aware of her surroundings because she can pick out a bad word when there isn't one.  It's cute but can be a little frustrating.

Sam was out working on our new shed last weekend when Leah came racing in the house.  She asked me with all seriousness if "damage" was a bad word.  So cute.  She heart "dam" and assumed the entire word must be bad.

That'll be a sweet memory for me.  Especially when she tries to use a few of those words in her years to come. :)

Family Night

Our family night last night was so fun.  Over dinner we found out that Jessie had a midterm test in religion this week.   She said the test covered everything from the Old Testament through Paul.  I was asking her some questions and was convinced that she needed some extra practice.  I pulled some Bible trivia questions off the internet and we had a boys vs. girls competition.  In the end, the girls one by one point.  That's a good thing.

I thought I'd post some of the more creative answers of the night.

Whose birthday is at Christmas time?
Robbie's answer:  "Who is Jesus?" (We're not on Jeopardy)

What holiday remembers Jesus' crucifixion?
Jessie's answer:  "Black Friday"   Hmmmm.....?

Name three of the plagues God sent to the Egyptian people to convince the Pharoah to let the Hebrew slaves go.

Jessie's answer: "Black Plague"
Sam's answer: "Fiery Darts"
Jen's answer: "Meteors"

What means of execution did the Romans use to kill Jesus?
Robbie's answer:  "Crown of Shame"

Notice that all of the answers came from the father and the three oldest children.  Needless to say, we laughed an awful lot.  It was some good family time that now has some funny memories attached.  Perfect!

I love my family!

The Day Will Bring Some Lovely Thing

I love this poem.  The kids and I have memorized the first stanza.  We're working on the rest of it.  For two weeks now, I have been writing in my journal about the lovely things of my day.  Something that caught me "unaware".  Sometimes I only have one thing to write, sometimes two or three.

For instance:  finding Lili standing up in her crib talking to herself after a nap, myriads of birds in the backyard after a snowstorm, tossing out peanuts to the bluejays and watching them dive to get them and fly them back to a high branch to eat, giggling with a lady at the craft store because we were both singing a BeeGee's song playing over the speakers.  

Just cute and fun things like that.  Sometimes my lovely thing is a little more poignant, like: receiving an answer to my prayers or hearing Joey read and retain.

I encourage you to try and do the same.  It's kind of a twist on things you're grateful for, I think that's an important one too, but I'm liking the review of my day to remember "some lovely thing."

The Day Will Bring Some Lovely Thing ~
by Grace Noll Crowell

The day will bring some lovely thing,
I say it over each new dawn,
Some gay, adventurous thing to hold
Against my heart when it is gone,
And so I rise and go to meet
The day with wings upon my feet.

I come upon it unaware,
Some sudden beauty without name,
A snatch of song, a breath of pine,
A poem lit with golden flame-
High tangled bird notes keenly thinned
Like flying color on the wind.

No day has ever failed me, quite
Before the grayest day is done,
I come upon some misty bloom,
Or a late line of crimson sun.
Each night I pause, remembering,
Some gay, adventurous, lovely thing.